From a life where weekly meal plans and big shop Sunday book-ended my week, I have arrived at a place that requires mail redirection, crashing in spare rooms - and being fed by others.
There had been a rhythm before. I knew the recipes I liked, I cooked them in familiar tins and ate them in familiar patterns. While my cookbooks and kitchen things are packed away in boxes, people I love have let me take comfort in their little rituals. Â
I’ve been well fed. I’ve eaten freshly cooked crepes with crème fraîche and apricots, muesli topped with yogurt and a spoonful of home-stewed apple. Mushroom soup poured from a jug and sprinkled with fresh parsley. Salad served with triangles of cheddar and slices of ripe pear on the slide. Birthday lamb koftas with tabbouleh followed by honey and lemon cake. Emma Bridgewater’s meatballs in two sauces.
I’ve tucked my chair in at kitchen tables in various postcodes between Cambridgeshire and London and each plate laid in front of me has brought a small surprise. People bring little quirks to the food they make.
I’ve had a taste of an apple with red flesh that I’d never think to buy. I’ve savoured cheese that’s been sliced into long, thin triangles - more elegant than the fat rectangles I default to. I’ve enjoyed the crunch of finely diced red pepper inside a ham salad sandwich - and the chunks of toasted pitta stirred in a Fattoush salad that I would never think to make.
Whatever the dish, the host has their own way of serving it, a unique set of mealtime rituals they follow without having to think about. Some lay big bowls of food on the table and pass them round, others portion and plate it up. Sometimes there are water jugs and warmed plates, or mint teas after dinner. Sharing the intimacies of these settled routines has been hugely comforting.
And now, their foodie quirks are shaping my own. I drink mint tea after dinner some nights and instead of taking a bite of a whole fruit, I sometimes slice it and plate it up. I think I’ll start cutting cheese into elegant triangles too. In these small ways, I’m showing myself the kindnesses that others have shown me.